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računalniški
hollywoodoperatingsystem
//vici/računalniški/hollywood
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Guidelines to development on the HOLLYWOOD OPERATING SYSTEM
- Any PERMISSION DENIED has an OVERRIDE function.
- Complex calculations and loading of huge amounts of data will be accomplished in under three seconds. In the movies, modems transmit data at two gigabytes per second.
- When the power plant/missile site/whatever overheats, all the control panels will explode, as will the entire building.
- If you display a file on the screen and someone deletes the file, it also disappears from the screen. There are no ways to copy a backup file -- and there are no undelete utilities.
- If a disk has got encrypted files, you are automatically asked for a password when you try to access it.
- No matter what kind of computer disk it is, it'll be readable by any system you put it into. All application software is usable by all computer platforms.
- The more high-tech the equipment, the more buttons it has. However, everyone must have been highly trained, because the buttons aren't labeled.
- Most computers, no matter how small, have reality-defying three-dimensional, real-time, photo-realistic animated graphics capability.
- Laptops, for some strange reason, always seem to have amazing real-time video phone capabilities and the performance of a Cray.
- Whenever a character looks at a terminal, the image is so bright that it projects itself onto his/her face.
- Computers never crash during key, high-intensity activities. Humans operating computers never make mistakes under stress.
- (From Independence Day) No matter what kind of virus it is, any computer can be infected with it -- even an alien spaceship's computer -- simply by running a virus upload program on a laptop.
- (From Jurassic Park) A custom system with millions of lines of code controlling a multimillion dollar theme park can be operated by a 13 year old who has seen a Unix system before. Seeing an operating system means you know how to run any application on that system, even custom apps.
Note: What OS was it really running?
(1) "These are super computers". A CrayOS?
(2) "Quicktime movie, Apple logo, trash can." MacOS?
(3) "Reboot. System ready. C:\" DOS?
(4) "Hey, this is Unix. I know this" Unix?
The computers in Jurassic Park were Cray supercomputers running the MacOS as a graphical shell of DOS all layered on top of a Unix base.
- You cannot stop a destructive program or virus by unplugging the computer. Presumably the virus has it's own built-in power supply.
- You cannot stop a destructive program downloading onto your system by unplugging the phone line. You must figure out the mandatory "back door" all evil virus programmers put in.
- Computers only crash if a virus or a hacker is involved.
- All text must be at least 72 points.
- Word processors do not have an insert point.
- The only way to reboot is to shut off the main power to the building.
- Passwords can be guessed in three and exactly three tries. If you cannot guess the password in three tries, you must give up immediately.
//vici/računalniški/hollywood
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